Thinking Out Loud

By Michael Friedman © 2010

I'm not sure which is scarier, trying to make a change or being afraid of the possible outcome of those actions.

I realize now that the mind is a terrible thing to waste after having accepted that I spent way to much time hiding in the shadows of my subconscious on a daily basis in the past.

Once paralyzed by morphing realities, I previously tried to navigate my way through my waking dreams only to find that I've been standing still the whole time. I am now aware of my past misconceptions.

Wise sages suggest that purgatory occurs when a person living on Earth knows the things they must do to bring an end to their suffering, but despite having this knowledge, they refuse to change and often experiencing the torment that troubles many who can't find peace in this life as a result of their refusal to take the necessary steps towards personal redemption.

I was once one of those people who desperately tried to control the outcome of my realities so that I could find a moment of peace here and there. It never worked and it brought me to my knees on a number of occasions.

Eventually my need to ask eternal questions led me to the conclusion that the only way to get out of purgatory was to flow with life instead of trying to isolate my many momentary lapses of reason on a regular basis.

Upon the realization of this concept, my attachments to my fears and self-induced anxiety began to dissolve piece by bloody piece, and my universe began to expand dramatically now that I could finally see the horizon line.

The reality that the sun would shine whether I was here or not was possibly the most freeing realization one can ever experience.

Becoming aware of one's insignificance and accepting that this is reality is one we choose to construct is humbling at first, but then it sets fire to your heart like a lightning strike that shocks the soul into action.

For people like me, it is impossible to deny the self-acknowledged truth that we find when we finally decide to pay attention to the small print of life.

I keep telling myself to abide by the philosophy of Caveat Emptor because you only get one chance on this thrill ride. I now know that it is not whether you win or lose but whether you enjoyed playing the game along the way that is key to finding nirvana in this life.

Once you realize that the world is what you make of it and you come to accept that you manifest your experience through your words, thoughts, and actions, you can find ways to take control and take a leap of faith that will let you enjoy the ride before the music stops.

At the end of the day, the only person who has to be comfortable with you is you. Accepting this philosophy and finding a way to act upon your awareness that we are the creators of our destiny offers inquisitive souls like us the forbidden fruit that the rest of the world hungers for.

I find it is strangely ironic that we all have the ingredients for salvation inside of us, yet it seemingly takes forever to taste this universal concoction's luscious nectar. For many like me, once they've drunk in the succulent joy juice of the universe, it becomes easier to achieve that state of mind on a regular basis through vigilant practice. I call it bliss on tap.

Although I am still a learning Jedi master, I find solace and comfort with every life-altering step forward that I take. I gain more and more control each time I master my emotions.

Like the girl said in the movie, "Run Forrest, run."

Life is like a box of chocolates stuffed with crack so be ready to roll with the highs and the lows. If you can keep from overdosing on your ego, the world is your proverbial oyster and you will find that you have achieved heaven on Earth.

At least, that's what I keep telling myself.


Michael Friedman is a writer from Las Vegas, NV.